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‘I Love You (U)’

‘Mere desh ki dharti, sona ugale, ugale heere moti, mere desh ki dharti’ Have you heard it recently? May be Gurgaonites must have been buzzing themselves into the long forgotten, but intermittently played ‘smart’ song. First ever city’s Municipal elections are on and Gurgaon has all the heads up for their beloved state and country. ‘Mere desh ki dharti, sona ugale, ugale heere moti, mere desh ki dharti’ Have you heard it recently? May be Gurgaonites must have been buzzing themselves into the long forgotten, but intermittently played ‘smart’ song. First ever city’s Municipal elections are on and Gurgaon has all the heads up for their beloved state and country. Almost all the aspirants are trying to make their way into voter’s coronary artery by playing the old patriotic songs (as we have almost none in recent times!) that 30+ generation of today had at least once heard of. For their father’s generation, it had been a bathroom song for years. ‘Pappu can’t dance saala’ or ‘Chaar baj gaye hain’ are not apt for the occasion. May be they could be played when anyone out of them celebrate their victory. Depending on the currency turnover of the aspirants, the political leaders have tried to get the best deal for them. The more affluent ones have managed to arrange plush sedans playing the song on the sophisticated speakers; some have been able to rope in some SUVs to give a rich look to the entire pomp and show. Less rich and probably, the miser ones too have tried to make best possible use of the shared autos manned by small kids in school uniform—not sure if they have bunked the school or they get off to attend one en route! I heard somewhere, sometimes back that kids are the future of the nation, and I was pleased to see them getting involved in the electoral process of world’s largest democracy at this early age! ‘Jahaan daal daal par sone ki chidiya karti hain basera, wo bharat desh hai mera’ is also being played in quick successions. We aren’t sure what the aspirants mean by playing it! Do we still have a ‘sone ki chidiya’ residing in here or it is hibernating somewhere in Switzerland lockers. There is no harm in roping in someone from Salim Ali Centre of Ornithology to research the same, provide us with their findings and ways to get this bird back. After all, our bird should be in our cage, not anyone else’s. Moreover, it has been too long for the hibernation to end. ‘Hai preet jahaan ki reet sada, main geet wahan ke gaata hoon; bharat ka rehne wala hoon, bharat ki baat sunata hoon’ can be heard in the midst of above two songs being played extremely loud trying hard to dominate both of ‘em. True to its meaning, we have been considerate towards some fortunate men on the earth—Kasab, to cite one name. He might have killed hundreds of people in the country’s financial capital, but we plead mercy for him, upbring him and wait for another Kandahar to be registered in India’s history. Even though the US people and Leadership haven’t slept well until Osama was killed, we still have a good night sleep under Good Knight unscathed by the pain and anguish families of those killed have been suffering from. Suddenly, ‘Mera rang de basanti chola’ screeches through the hot afternoons and tries to get a major traction out of it. In today’s times of boutiques and brands, basanti chola is trying hard to find a place. It can go as an occasional treat on weekends and in some parties too, but then it is inconsequential at this juncture. Immediately, the record stops at ‘Rang de…’ as a crowd appears from nowhere with scores of vehicles, clerics, family members distributing pamphlets, showering flowers. You can easily shortsight a unique appearing vehicle amongst the moving machines, and can see someone with all his/her smiles, folded hands trying to ask, ‘Have you ever seen me?’ We, as if watching a wedding procession, could recall him/her as on the posters wishing us Diwali, Holi, Eid, New Year as and when they happen. With people chanting his ‘Jai’, the EJ (Election Jockey) switches on the Oscar winning song, ‘Jai ho’ and the entire environment is filled up with ecstasy, with the pride (priggishness?) dancing on EJ’s face on having played the song on time and as per the expectations of his Master. The aspirant with the floral garlands twisted many times around his neck laughs in between with his fellow workers as if he had been rehearsing it since some time. He falls into the vehicle sometimes, gives a huge laugh while he erupts as if attending a rave party, makes a ‘V’ shape out of his middle and fore finger and displays solace when his group of cavaliers block the traffic of the entire place giving him a feeling of law maker and protector. We all come out after hearing the speakers blurt out the fictional facts and factual fictions just to ensure we see modern day’s heroes and zeroes. We all try to count how much of our TDS would have gone into the procession and how much more have been planned once the aspirants win the elections. Asudden, out of the blue, the aspirant jumps out of the cavalcade and touches an old woman’s feet asking for her wishes. The grand old woman in her 80s, ached with myopia and hypermetropia smiles, keeps her hands on the aspirant’s head adjusting her broken specs. The aspirant feels contended passing on the message to the masses that he is one of them and must be considered this time. He rushes and picks up a child playing with a street dog implying he is better than him. He rings the bell of each and every household to ask for their votes. On not getting a response from any of it, he jumps off the locked gate, and enters the living room to show his proximity towards the general public. The woman folk alone at their home run in frenzy anticipating robbers’ attack, but are calmed down by the aspirant as he calls them ‘sister’ and says, “I Love You all”. We watch them do all this as we know it’s once in a 5-year opportunity we can’t miss. We see this from our Balcony and think of canceling the movie tickets we had planned to see that night. We think this all makes up for it!!! Moreover, apart from being free, this show is live, not time bound and doesn’t require you to spend extra 1000 bucks on soft drinks and pop corms during the break. We can see them moving to their next destination playing—har karam apna karenge, ai vatan tere liye; dil diya hai, jaan bhi denge, ae vatan tere liye’